At night – when the world is silent, that is when the demons come. The ones that tell you what you don’t have, or should have or lost. The ones who tell you you are lonely and why don’t you have a family of your own, a lover, a career or anything…The ones who speak terrible thoughts in your mind. You wish they would stop, but when there is nothing but complete silence and insomnia – what do you do? I haven’t been in the media world for three months. Blogging was my only outlet. I am ready to leave. I think I have narrowed down my choices, but they are on the opposite ends of the map. I did find a house in one of the places today, though. I am scared. Scared to make a wrong decision yet once again. This place, here is not for me. I can’t move forward. I am stuck in mediocrity and sadness. We are figuring it out slowly. I painted these rocks – to make me happy. Except when I was done, I burst out in laughter because they all looked like lumps of coal. This color was the only chalkboard paint I had and in theory it was a good idea, but I don’t want to give anyone what looks like a lump of coal. bhwahah. Whatever makes you laugh, right!? and that is what we did.
{ 1 trackback }